bi•zarre / bi?zär/ (Adj) Very strange or unusual.

I’ve been using the word BIZARRE a lot lately, I suppose when you live in a place like Shanghai you get to use it a lot (there is some seriously amusing shit that happens here). But, In light of recent events I fear I’m not justified in using it here – in fact the stuff that happens here (no matter how strange) has nothing on whats happening at home!

You see I’ve been watching the US elections closely, I love the soap opera of it all, I think it’s the best reality show on TV. Anyway the point is, I love the way that every comment, every step, every dollar and every single decision each candidate has ever made or not made is put under a microscope and abused by the media, the public and the opposition.

It’s a brilliant system to test each potential American president (sure it’s not perfect – GW Bush got in twice) but at least it gives the people a fair indication of what they are voting for! It forces any mistake each candidate has made into the spotlight and generally the cheating lying bastards get whittled down (again I confess it’s not perfect)

So when I read an article that says our President JZ is planning to spend R200m upgrade to his compoung (not house – COMPUND!), the word bizarre immediately enters my head. Not only that but another R300 – R600m is going to spent on roads around his home. Even more bizarre. In fact so fucking bizarre that I’m almost inclined to join JuJu to insight some violence among the striking miners!!

The most bizarre of all is the way the Pres defended this by saying the area should not be punished because it is his homestead?!

Here is what the compound looked like when JZ was merely the premier of KZN in 2009 (and the fucking biggest joke is that it was a ‘gift’ from an Indian business man at the time – how the fuck did we not see this all coming!)

Here’s what it looks like today (see any small improvements?) based on ‘gifts’, ‘donations’ and some ‘government spending’. How this dude has managed to escape fraud charges makes me think that JuJu is not only going to dodge his tax problems but probably end up with the tax man owing him!!

(Do yourself a little favour and compare the hill vs village ratio in the first pic and then the second! For the full size pics GO HERE)

Just for a moment imagine you are one of the people (and by one of the people I mean the 80%+ who live in poverty) surrounding King Zuma’s compound. Imagine everyday seeing your brothers, sisters and children starving, homeless and hopeless. All the while JZ keeps building bigger and fancier pieces of his presidential compound. I cannot believe they haven’t torched the place yet!

When I talk about bizarre there could not be a better example of the word than a president, using tax money to build himself, not a small house extension but a clinic, heli pad, boarding houses and palaces for fuck knows how many concubines, and yet the public does nothing! The public strikes about low wages and miners treated unfairly and yet we all allow the finger to be pointed somewhere else (mostly at apartheid still) every time. I would really like to do a calculation on how much we could increase the miners wages if we took the R800m that JZ is planning to spend in his backyard and give it to them?

What’s bizarre is not that our President is raping us blind while chuckling at us (PLEASE DO YOURSELF A FAVOUR AND GO WATCH THE ZA NEWS VIDEOS ON THIS! THEY ARE BRILLIANTLY HYSTERICAL!) but that we just seem to sit back and take what’s given to us.

It seems once again Zapiro has managed to capture one of South Africa’s biggest problems in one simple cartoon!


Can Youth Day %$#@-ups unite Malema & the DA?

I always find it interesting how certain things happen at certain times for reasons that reveal themselves at a later stage. I’m a great believer in fate and I always try look for why things happen, when they do.

This youth day our dear Pres. Jacob Zuma was in Mexico standing proud with the world’s leaders at the G20 Summit (seems like there’s always a summit of some kind to satisfy 3rd world leaders wives need for a 1st world  shopping trip).

This is the first time a president of South Africa (after we emerged from the dark ages of course) has not been in the country during the HIGHLY symbolic Youth Day.

If you are not sure what Youth Day is exactly or why it is symbolic maybe you should read here first!

This is probably one of the most significant days in South African history and for the leader of the country not to be there to speak to the youth is beyond disgraceful, in fact it’s more disrespectful. You see so often leaders and governments disregard the youth because they think they have no power. If June 16 1976 has taught us anything it’s that the youth have a voice, a powerful voice, and they will use it to great effect if they are pushed far enough! The youth can topple leaders, government and throw countries into political chaos. If you lose the youth you lose a part of your control to govern the people – never forget that Mr President (although you may have already lost it)

What’s interesting is in the days leading up to youth day both Helen Zille  and the artist formerly known as the head of the ANCYL, JuJu, both criticized the president for his lack of attention to the youth!

Zille blatantly attacked the president’s ability to empathise saying

“We have a president who simply seems unable to understand the lives others lead. Empathy for the other, we know, is the beginning of the sincerest kind of reconciliation.”

This was almost mirrored by Juju’s comments during a rally held in the only place people still think he is worth something – Limpopo.

“But comrades you must know the real man, the man for his own family, the man who has no interest for his own people, the man for his tribe…the man whom we said was a unifier, the ANC today is more divided, what is the legacy of President Zuma? His legacy is that of being interrelate to the youth, is that of expelling those who disagree with him.”

Which got me to thinking about this very interesting proverb . . .

Now we all know that JZ and the DA are and continue to be political enemies but after recent expulsion events I think it’s fair to say JZ has made another powerful enemy in Julius, and the one thing that Julius has control over, is the youth!

If you are a little slow and can’t see what I’m getting at it’s that on this youth day where Zuma has been criticized so many times about failing the youth, has his blatant absence opened the door for two of the most unlikely allies to form a rather powerful political team?

Don’t get me wrong now.

Firstly, I think it’s not possible for a multitude of reasons, least of all that JuJu is too much of a loose cannon and political liability that he is virtually uncontrollable.

Secondly, I don’t think that our Julius is smart enough to understand that the only way he will ever make it back onto the political spotlight is if he reinvents himself, not as a white-hating, land-grabbing extremist, but as a man of the youth ready to fight for whichever leader shows they are focused on our youth (and whose power teet he can suckle on next).

It’s a dream (or nightmare scenario), but wouldn’t it be fun to see JuJu and Helen on the same side?

I think even if I get to hear JuJu respond to ‘Do you hate white people?’ with ‘NO! I love them’ just one more time in an interview it will be worth the political drama!


The TRANSPARENT government?

I brought up Barack Obama’s bailout briefly the other day to try and illustrate how powerful transparency of expenditure can be for a government.

With a simple website and something long forgotten in politician school, honesty, the President went from being the most untrustworthy first citizen to someone the masses could get on board with. He essentially managed to convince a nation that had recently lost everything to, not only give him more money from their tax coffers than ever before, BUT ALSO without the widespread chaos that I expected. Fast forward to today and for the first time since the bankers destroyed the world in 08 the employment numbers are up, those bailed out are now making more money than before and it seems for now that part of the Presidents problem seems to be solving itself.

So what’s my point here? Do I think our government should be handing out money to try fix the massive social and economic decay facing this nation?

Plainly, F*@K NO I wouldn’t let them hand out food stamps – you saw what happened when they tried to hand out condoms at the ANC centenary (in other news get ready for an influx of baby JUJU’s)!

However, imagine for a moment a country that prided itself on truth, honesty and integrity.  A nation not scarred by previous regimes, a country with leaders not out to spend their time in office filling their pockets, but a democratically elected leadership who told its citizens where exactly its tax money was going.

A small smile creeps up my face as I can feel your skepticism – don’t worry we, like an abused single mother, have been hurt too many times in the past to trust again that easily.

Most people don’t really understand budgets (the country’s credit card debt numbers are evident of that) but here’s a ‘budgets for dummies’ for you.

No matter if the budget is R1000 or R100 billion – the principal is the same. At the start of the fiscal year you start out with a number and you divide it up based on the expenses, you use the previous year as a guide and the coming year as an influence and you make the best decisions you can to split the money in such a way that you will cover all bases. You then hope that your projected income is delivered and then the sums should make sense and you make some money. The theory is really rather simple – the practice however is slightly harder but you get the basic understanding.

Now imagine you as a citizen of a country could log onto the governments website and see exactly how this money was split. What healthcare was allocated VS education VS safety and security VS (most importantly government housing allowances).  I’m not talking about an auditor general’s report that comes out and has so much grey area that it may as well be London in autumn, I mean an easy to use easy to understand website. A place where ALL expenses must be channeled through and explained. Surely if there is an expense it requires some kind of explanation, and surely that explanation is not illegal or unethical then there is no harm in sharing it with the public.

You see under the cloak of governmental darkness, things can be hidden, that’s where people take chances and thats where corruption starts it cancerous life and is fed until it becomes the deadly stage 4 and a country is on life support.

As citizens who are united only by our distrust of this and every other government we need to start asking MORE or our elected officials! We have forgotten who the customer in this relationship is quite simply. You may not realize it but we pay for services that we expect to be done and when they are not, and when our money is being stolen so blatantly surely we have to be stricter on our service providers and in this case it’s the government.

At the end of the day the public, the paying public has the power. You see WE are the ones depositing billions into government funds every month to use ‘to run the country’ and if we don’t, well, at first there will be a standoff (and all the chaos that comes with that) but at some point one party will have to cave. I truly believe with the correct public leader and the right process we can change democracy in a way that will affect future governments around the world.

Imagine that, South Africa leading the fight to a transparent democracy, one where the citizens have the right to see where their money is going. Seems so simple doesn’t it!

The SHABBY SHAIK syndrome!

Let us forget for a moment the world class slime fest that is Shabir Shaik shall we, because it seems that South Africans have just accepted that this cheating bastard should not be in jail because he is on the verge of death!

Please see the pic below for proof of his illness (sounds like the defense’s argument for his release on Medical Parole)

Let’s rather look at the next one who is playing ‘the hospital card’!

Thanks must go as always to Zaprio for his magical command of the political scene with merely a few sketches!


Now after I saw Jackie was headed straight to the emergency room, I decided to take to twitter and try rally some support, the response I got was a little more naïve than I expected from our normally beautifully cynical Mandy Weiner!


You see maybe I’m just of the mind frame of ‘Once bitten, twice shy’ but I cannot believe that dear Jackie Selebi has managed to get terminally ill in the five minutes that his appeal was rejected. Yes, yes I know those of you who are corruption fans will be shouting that he has been sick for a while. I don’t deny this BUT can you idiots please understand that I’m sure he had a backup plan since day one. It’s not like he was going to be healthy all the way through then keel over as the appeal ended – he’s been playing you all for months people!

I guess overall I’m just tired of getting screwed as a citizen, I mean we pay high taxes, our money generally gets stolen one way or another by our government and their friends and to be fair I’m happy to pay that toll to live the lifestyle in the country I do. BUT, when a man gets freed from jail because (again let me emphasize) HE WAS GOING TO DIE, and then we find him getting in a mosque-brawl (yeah my first time too) and still this doesn’t seem to violate his parole enough to stick that sneaky bitch back in jail – something is wrong people!

Time will tell whether or not Jackie playing the same game here but the difference between Shabby and Jackie is that Shabby is on the Zuma team, I mean he was the one who gave the Prez the corruption cash so you can only expect he can call in a few favors when he needs them – Jackie sadly can’t (well he can but Glenn Aglitotti has been in enough shit himself) so they are not likely to make any difference!

I have said I will reserve judgment on Jackie but let’s be honest, the innocent until proven guilty scenario really is tinged with irony right now. The fact of the matter is that another convicted fraudster sits in a hospital bed working out just which way is the best to bypass the legal system and cheat every single honest South African. If that doesn’t make you a little angry then get out your golf bag and book a tee off time with Shabby because you are clearly in on it as well!


The great African problem!

After having dinner with a couple of very intelligent people at the base of the Stellenbosch Mountains, the inevitable happened after a few bottles of wine, a philosophical discussion was sparked. The subject of which was why certain countries succeed and some don’t?

First it was decided that we’re probably all destined to fail because with the rate at which populations are and will grow we will suck up every natural resource the earth has and probably in our lifetimes civilization may very well collapse. So we turned our attention to the current successes and failures.

There are an obvious reason of resources, infrastructure, perhaps good governance and the fact that they were left alone and never colonized (which is actually the politically correct word for RAPING a country). Most of these reasons were used in the defense of why African nations tend to implode!

The truth is there is little defense for the behavior that has gone on in Africa post colonization. There are basically no examples on the African continent of a country that has left the shackles of colonization and bettered itself through hard work, positive focus and a lack of corruption. In fact it’s like an African template.

People revolt against colonialism (rightly so by the way), new leader takes over, new leader likes money, new leader gets greedy, new leader refused to leave, new leader becomes a dictator and proceeds to fuck up every positive thing the country had going for them (maybe a slightly generalized view but please tell me I’m wrong) and finally turns to killing, raping and torturing any opposition in their way. Its become so ridiculous that we’ve seen ad campaigns based on it (and they’ve gone viral globally)


The only difference in South Africa is two things, one is the leadership, courage and selflessness of one Nelson Mandela who basically stopped civil war by himself (if I was him I would have come out of those prison cells with two shots guns and pretended I was in a scene from zombieland!) and the other is that our young democracy hasn’t been given enough time to be tested – as we speak it is faltering not even twenty years on!

The question is, why is this an AFRICAN PROBLEM? Countries like India have had the colonization problem and now they are emerging as one of the globes superpowers along with China.

After much discussion there was no clear answer. Is it that the culture in Africa is different, one of greed and power mongering? I don’t think so, I think that’s a global problem not just ours. Is it because our leaders are just more prone to dictatorship? Not really, dictators have ruled countries all over the world throughout history.

I guess the only rational thing I can think is that our countries are, relatively, too young. We haven’t made the mistakes yet that other first world countries have made. Germany learnt their dictator lesson in WWI & II for example and they had almost 70 years to rebuild to where they are today. But then you think of places like Sweden, Finland and Switzerland that just sort of worked from the word ‘go’.

The only thing I’m scared of is that we as Africans are not as fast learners, I’m afraid we have an animal farm mentality and we may continue to make the same mistakes for a while. The mistakes of corruption and greed creating too much poverty and too much resentment between classes that it can’t ever be fixed!

In the meantime though we are wasting what is, without question, potentially the richest continent on this planet. We have natural resource gushing out of the earth and yet we still manage to screw it up. Before long we will have raped the resources dry and then where will the narcissistic nouveau –riche dictators of Africa be? Sadly on a private yacht in the Bahamas I guess (our legal systems are probably the only thing worse than our dictators)


A lesson in socialism Mr Obama (and more importantly for the SAn public)!

I was sent this by a South African friend living gin Sao Paulo of all places. The point Is not to comment or disagree with Barack “I still think he is the world’s savior’ Obama but rather to understand the impact of a decision like this in our own context.

What’s important is to read the experiment and then to read the questions for South Africa at the bottom!

An economics professor at a local college made a statement that he had never failed a single student before, but had recently failed an entire class. That class had insisted that Obama’s socialism worked and that no one would be poor and no one would be rich, a great equalizer. 

The professor then said, “OK, we will have an experiment in this class on Obama’s plan”.. All grades will be averaged and everyone will receive the same grade so no one will fail and no one will receive an A…. (substituting grades for dollars – something closer to home and more readily understood by all).

 After the first test, the grades were averaged and everyone got a B. The students who studied hard were upset and the students who studied little were happy. As the second test rolled around, the students who studied little had studied even less and the ones who studied hard decided they wanted a free ride too so they studied little.

The second test average was a D! No one was happy. When the 3rd test rolled around, the average was an F.

As the tests proceeded, the scores never increased as bickering, blame and name-calling all resulted in hard feelings and no one would study for the benefit of anyone else.

To their great surprise, ALL FAILED and the professor told them that socialism would also ultimately fail because when the reward is great, the effort to succeed is great, but when government takes all the reward away, no one will try or want to succeed.



Remember, there IS a test coming up. The 2012 elections in South Africa.  These are possibly the 5 best sentences you’ll ever read and all applicable to this experiment:

1. You cannot legislate the poor into prosperity by legislating the wealthy out of prosperity.

2. What one person receives without working for, another person must work for without receiving.

3. The government cannot give to anybody anything that the government does not first take from somebody else.

4. You cannot multiply wealth by dividing it!

5. When half of the people get the idea that they do not have to work because the other half is going to take care of them, and when the other half gets the idea that it does no good to work because somebody else is going to get what they work for, that is the beginning of the end of any nation.

A dark day indeed #BlackTuesday!

I sat on 22 November “Black Tuesday”  in a pension fund board meeting that looks after roughly 40 000 lower LSM South Africans and much to the irritation and dismay of my board members I was glued to my twitter feed from @EWNreporter and other reputable journo’s present at the passing of the Secrecy bill.

I could not help but think of the fact that the people we were spending the day ensuring their futures are safe financially (who feed roughly 5 people for each person employed so more than 200 000 people) had voted in a party that was in the process of taking away one of the most important rights I have as a free citizen.

Suddenly my entire body filled with anger!

About two months ago I wrote an article about this bill and the danger it poses, needless to say as a rather unknown blogger I didn’t have much impact on parliament. Despite my pre-warning, yesterday the bill was passed in a house that looked and sounded like a cross between a zoo and a kindergarten playground based on the behavior of most ‘elected officials’

Yesterday as I burnt with anger, my soul filled with sorrow, because as hard as the founders of the ANC fought for freedom (in every sense of the word), crowned in a way  by Nelson Mandela’s famous words in 1997 “Press freedom would never be under threat in South Africa for as long as the ANC is the majority party” I realized that the dream they had realized was being pissed on by the new ANC, the ones who want the money, the ones who want ultimate power, the ones who behave like ANIMAL FARM!

We have worked so fucking hard in this country for a bunch of corrupt cowards to erode away at it and we have so many devastatingly serious problems without our government being able to hide their disgusting abuse of power behind the shadows in the name of national security. National security, HA! What fucking national security do we have and what national security do we really need that is so important to be able to black out any transgression the government choose.

I hear the hopefuls saying this isn’t the end of the fight, and when I re-watched Lindiwe Mazibuko speak on behalf of the DA I began to cry. She managed to stay so calm and so poised when all others were ready to take to the streets. She spoke with such still power and harrowing words that the reality of what had just happened sunk in. In that moment as I sat fearing the worst, I listened to minister after minister (of all races and colours and genders) speak from the heart and then get booed and hissed at by an ANC that would have disgraced its forefathers.

To echo Lindiwe “let the message ring out from this house across South Africa: the ANC has abandoned the values of its foundations exactly 100 years after it was founded”

The sad thing is, I think most of parliament doesn’t care really, they’re like spoiled brats in a sweet store. They want to stuff their fat faces full of as much chocolate as they can while they can and everyone else can clean up the mess they leave behind.

While I don’t share the panic quite to the extent of some of my facebook friends suggesting tickets to Oz are the only answer, I do share the deep sorrow every journalist around this country must feel today and I hope that this is not the end of this fight.

I hope someone, someone other than a rather unknown blogger, has the strength to push this fight as far as it needs to go because if we don’t, if we allow a wave of darkness to cover what ever wrongdoings it sees fit, then my fellow South Africans we may never see the light again. The nagging concern in the back of my mind is, sadly our only recourse is the constitutional court . . .


“For to be free is not merely to cast off one’s chains, but to live in a way that respects and enhances the freedom of others” – Nelson Mandela


Stand and applaud as the ANC regains its soul!

Yesterday was a defining day in the future of South African politics, not because JuJu was beaten like the insolent child he is (I think the Hawks were and still are going to F#@K him anyway) but because of the way the ANC have handled themselves over the past few weeks.

This has no doubt been a difficult few months for the ruling party!

The first hint of disciplinary action set off a call to arms for JuJu’s supporters which led to the uptick in support through the marches for economic ‘just give me money for free’ freedom. I’m pretty sure JuJu felt relatively safe that he had enough support to scare the ANC into letting him go, and why not? He was gaining followers, he was making front page news and he was obviously confident enough to threaten the leadership of the most powerful party in the country!

The questions that I’m sure the disciplinary committee asked itself and its leaders were, do we draw a line in the sand now and face whatever consequences it may bring or do we bury our heads in the sand because it’s the easier option – I’m very proud to say they chose the former!

Similarly to the Dalai Lama decision (although right and wrong are a little more clear cut in this example) this was a very tough call to make and when Derek Hanekom stood to read his 136 page verdict, pride began to swell inside me like never before. Again I must re-iterate not because of the subject matter (ok a little – it was glorious to see that brat get a beating even though he wasn’t there to take it himself) but for the way the ANC conducted itself.

The ANC made a point to go back to its roots of a proud, disciplined organization run with truth and integrity at its heart. They made a point to say somewhere along the line we have let this trouble maker and his band of merry degenerates get out of hand and portray this organization as something very far from what its founding fathers had in mind and finally, and most importantly, they made a point to say enough is enough!

The level of detail with which the hearings and the verdicts conducted were nothing short of impeccable and the outcomes were fair and just for all parties (this of course as our JuJu supporting readers keep telling – is my opinion!) The deliberations were done with calm heads and the answers at the press conference were clear and confident. Although I am not an ANC supporter or voter (I have been in the past) I must say that if this party starts to rule like this I may become one of their strongest followers (we have light years to go before they have cleaned up their act enough though)

All in all I must commend the ruling party and its leaders for an exemplary job on the whole and I just hope that those selected for appeals board don’t allow this great line that has been drawn in the sand to be rubbed out or moved! You comrades have been proud and stood up to the task – best you do the same now!

Sometimes you choose between right & right: The Dalai Lama was the wrong right!

I don’t often defend the South African government, in fact I think this is the first time I can remember (I did a search on the blog and found THESE – none of them positive) and so now I find myself in unfamiliar territory (and I’m pretty sure I’m going to seriously anger a few people) so here goes!

When I was young my dad gave me a book called “Defining Moments: When managers must choose between right and right”, although at the time I didn’t quite understand the concept but over the next 10 years I have made many painful decisions where both choices would have been the correct one, therefor they fall into this category.

South Africa’s decision regarding the Dalai Lamas visit was no different!

This was a defining moment and without doubt a choice between letting one of the greatest spiritual leaders of our time come for another’s birthday, and to appease a global giant for our own economic salvation.

If you are confused here’s a quick summary. This is the Dalai Lama, he is essentially the spiritual leader of Tibet and the political leader in exile, if you will, with massive influence – he is HATED by the People’s Republic of China’s government. Overall he is an amazingly wise spiritual man who does nothing worse than promote peace, humanity and equality (although he is opposed to oral or anal sex – minus one point for that!) and his name is Jetsun Jamphel Ngawang Lobsang Yeshe Tenzin Gyatso

He was invited by The Arch Desmond Tutu to speak at a number of university’s and attend the Arch’s 80th birthday. A simple enough request although travelling to SA the DL needed a VISA – eish, problem!

The SA’n government basically delayed this request indefinitely until yesterday when the DL decided to cancel his trip as it was clear he was not welcome! He posted this statement on his website.

Why you ask, was the government so hell bent on keeping him out? Quite simply the Chinese Government told us to. Jacob Zuma said he wasnt sure why there was a problem, Kgalema Motlanthe said he would have gotten his VISA eventually (he said this after the trip had already been cancelled). That was a little like saying we would have won the cricket world cup if Allan Donald hadn’t f#@ked up that last run (the saying ‘no comments on the scoreboard’ comes to mind!).

The truth is the South African government had to make a call. Do we allow someone into the country who, if we are completely honest, can do nothing TANGIBLE for us as a nation at the risk of severely pissing off our biggest global customer, China? The answer ladies and gentlemen is simply NO. We cannot afford to lose ANY business let alone the world’s most dominant economic superpower (well they will be shortly) especially when they can buy what we are selling somewhere else.

If China were to turn its back on South Africa the economic ramifications would be catastrophic for an emerging nation with the problems we have, in fact it may be crippling. The answer here was as simple as inviting a street child to sleep in your local Woolworths at the risk of chasing off the rest of your customers (I’m not saying the DL is a street child before any of you get pissy!) but in that instance anyone of you would side with the retailer without a moment’s hesitation – so why when YOUR economic destiny falls in the balance do you all of a sudden climb onto your high horse?

I’m proud that, for once, our government made a tough, public decision for the benefit of us as a nation and if you think that this wasn’t the case – GROW UP! Sometimes in life we have to make tough calls, we can’t make everyone happy and we certainly can’t just make decisions that have massive consequences just because The Arch and the DL are nice people. A government is elected to make the best decisions of behalf of the people and this is, WITHOUT DOUBT, what they did!

I have profound respect for the Dalai Lama and I mean no disrespect to him in any way but unfortunately we as a country sometimes need to play the political game not for gain but sometimes just to survive. Was it handled wrong, absolutely! All the silence and bungling of government officials for months was pathetic and for that I am ashamed. Do I think it’s right to try criticize the DL like the article by Simon Allison in the Daily Maverick, absolutely not – the man is practically the Tibetan Nelson Mandela, but at the end of the day I’ll stand behind their decision in this defining moment, because it was the RIGHT RIGHT!

From the rise of a potential dictator to the fall of another . . .

If you are a bit confused on the heading – read the previous post!

Libya is both a tremendously happy and a desperately sad discussion for me. It’s happy for obvious reasons and I don’t think I’ll go into those but the sadness is perhaps not a topic that is paid much attention.

I was watching the news channels, as we all were, over the last few weeks,and hoping that the rebels would take the capitol and allow the very long and very bumpy road of democracy to begin. While I was watching the overriding question was “where is Gadhafi hiding?” and I started to wonder why the hell these government fighters were still at their posts after they had been abandoned, not surprisingly by their leader? I mean the war is clearly over dudes, you lost, and it’s time to jump ship.

This is where the sadness started for me.

Sure there are those big burly narcissists, (you know them as white South African Police reservists mostly) who joined Gadhafi’s crew to be able to beat up innocents, run the streets and pretty much show off their small penis syndrome as often as possible. But as far as I’m concerned that’s the minority. The rest were merely civil servants who really were not given a choice. Their families were probably threatened or worse killed and if not they were pretty damn sure they would be. To put it into ‘normal’ perspective, they lived in a place where human life only meant something if one man thought so and sadly they were forced to oppress their own people!

I have to believe we live in a world where people in their hearts know the difference between good and evil and even though the latter may be drummed into them through every kind of unspeakable act, they would still, if free, choose the former. So as Gadhafi was no doubt being snuck off in a jet to a place where his type of leadership would be celebrated (Think Venezuela or Zim or probably North Korea or Limpopo) these poor men and woman who had been indoctrinated had to stand on the streets and fight against their own people. They had to kill those fighting for freedom.

I’m desperately happy that Libya has been liberated but I fear that no one will spare a thought for those who did not want to fight over these dark decades, those who put their lives on the line fighting to keep Gadhafi in power only because their alternative was certain death at his hands.

In all your most justified celebrations Libya, I implore you to think of these people because they probably suffered the most in life and in death will go down in history as the worst of the worst villains, yet in reality they had little choice than the one they were forced to take.

The saddest thing perhaps is the jackals who are waiting at the gates (in this specific case Donald ‘the hair’ Trump and his army of Yanks) to pick at the bones of a country left on the verge of death in every possible – but hey if Trump can make a quick buck why not?  #FAIL

For the amazing and trying pics of Libya go HERE and HERE

JuJu won’t go quietly into the night . . .

Now before you go all postal, this is a joke, the site was hacked (the ANCYL haven’t confirmed this but we assume) but the truth is just imagine for a moment this actually is what goes through JuJu’s brain – it certainly isn’t that far-fetched is it?

It’s time to get a little serious I fear (yeah sure after the last post was the legalization of Marijuana). Julius has been a concern of mine for a while, he has been for most of us. We’ve seen his tainted star rising like we’ve seen too many African dictators over the last 50 years and until now it’s been relatively in check.

The next week however may shape the rest of Julius’s political career and initially while I was excited the ‘Parent finally was going to beat the child’ it seems once again I have underestimated just how powerful JuJu is. Its seems a little Shakespearian almost with the prodigal son marching on the capital, ‘his army’ (true they must all be unemployed cause I’m not sure who gives people a few days off work to go protest?) at his back coming to dethrone the King. All the while the Kings Trusted advisor (Kgalema Mothlante who seems to be on team JuJu) is actually a traitor to the court.

The frightening thing is this battle may not end well (I mean for those who sort of like the way democracy, truth, honesty and justice work). Julius may actually prove once and for all he is untouchable (the hawks have already thrown in the towel on his investigation) which will mean nothing can stand in the way of his political aspirations of running and ‘changing’ (I mean destroying) this country.

The next week, on the streets of Joburg city, may shape the next 50 years of South African politics and while the rest of the nation squabbles around playing real life and worrying about whether the Boks have a nice send off and enough pillows in first class, I suggest we ALL keep a very close eye on the outcome of this hearing as it may be the justice we have been looking for for this spoiled brat or he may burn the house down with his parents inside it leaving him to tear a path of terror we have been fearing.

The problem I fear is that he will make a similar speech to the President in Independence day (not quite with the same noble intentions!) and while he is frighteningly annoying he has a connection with the masses (he is the African dream – similar to the American dream but instead of working hard and making a success you cheat, lie and steal to get rich).


The question that I still have not scenario planned in my own head is if JuJu does get the harshest punishment – what will the ‘expected 10 000 supporters’ plus the one idiot in chains do to the streets of JHB?

Is JuJu getting cooked or do we merely see smoke and assume there’s a roast?

So if we forget about the Hawks going through JuJu’s filing cabinet for a moment (I get a mental image of these embarrassed children looking through their parents wallet and apologizing every two minutes for being in there) because I’m pretty sure with his connections, as well as his knowledge of other law breakers he will slip out of this one like a lubricated snake out of a pile of jelly.

So let’s look at the ANC for hope of ‘ending’ JuJu shall we?

My only problem is, what Zapiro has summed up so superbly, once again . . .

There is a very interesting article written on the Daily Maverick about JuJu, his hearing, the outcomes and every and anything you could want to know, which is really superb! The problem I have is that while the ANC look like they are taking a tough stance here on JuJu and his genius side kick Floyd ‘I’m just as untouchable’ Shivambu, the charges are vague (and if you have EVER been to CCMA you will know vague charges are a KILLER), not only that but the ANCYL has requested and urgent meeting with the ANC to ‘discuss’ some things which is more code for ill roll over and you scratch my belly, and finally the ANCYL have put out a very appeasing statement on their website to temper the wrath of the powers that be!

What do we see coming out of these two disciplinary sessions – well for me there are two scenarios here.

One is what we hope will happen? Here I feel myself slipping towards the dark side a little and images of ‘sharks with frikken laser beams attached to their heads’ appear, but realistically I guess we hope he and Floyd are put into a position where they cannot affect anything related to South African politics, economy, perception and so on for a long enough time that they become irrelevant and powerless!

The second is what probably will happen and that’s the JuJu will remain unscathed and get a nice slap on the wrist to appease the public while proving not only that he has more power than any of us feared, but also that he can get away with pretty much anything he likes because (again in the immortal genius of Zapiro) . . .

Like I said a good few days ago ITS TIME FOR THE PARENT TO SMACK THE CHILD!

Time for the parent to smack the child!

I’m not into beating children. I was never smacked by my parents as a child when I misbehaved (probably because my two brothers beat me senseless when I stepped out of line) but in this case I feel it far far overdue.

Let’s just remind everyone here, the ANCYL is not a government body, they are not elected by democratic vote of the people and they have no political standing what-so-f*$#king-ever! They are and should be treated as the child body of the ANC and are merely politicians in training (or in this case deteriorating).

So, when they step out of line they should be smacked in the hope they stop behaving like political BRATS!

If you want to know my previous views on the youth league and their leader – here they are.

The truth is at first there was concern around Dear JuJu and what corrupt things he was doing behind closed doors (well hopefully we are seeing the tip of the iceberg on this) but my concern now is more for the ruling party. They have managed to get themselves into a position where they are seen not to be able to control their own child, more so they cannot even stand up to their child!!

The ANC has lost so much face over JuJu and his little gang of crony’s but this final issue on Botswana has just shown how scared the ANC are of its own child!

If you don’t know what happened, the ANCYL stated there needs to be regime change in Botswana and they were going to send a team of youth league trolls to investigate (we may as well send the under 8 netball team from Polokwane primary school as they have roughly the same political standing!).

Following this the ANC said Hai! they have crossed the line with this!

To which the ANCYL responded, you think we crossed the line, no no no no you can’t tell us what to do in public

Which brought about the ANC saying, the youth league were not allowed to rebuke their reprimand in public (you get how childish this squabble between our country’s leaders is?)

All in all it’s a mess, its embarrassing and if the ANC doesn’t get its screaming, crying little brat of a child under control we may soon make the Londoners problem look like a paper cut on an elephant!


Bheki Cele pimping it in the skies!

Please can SOMEONE explain to me, slowly, what the F%#K Bheki Cele needs a private jet for?

Our business travels a serious amount, but I mean a serious amount! I’m probably one of thirty or more  people who fly over 60 times a year and even we have done the math’s on a plane with the results being a saddening waste of funds. If that’s the case can someone please explain how the CAPEX for Bheki’s plane passed under the taxpayers noses?

I suppose we should have been more skeptical of a dude who came into office looking like this . . .

Now don’t get me wrong here, I dig Bheki! He is cool, he came in saying things like “Chest in, Stomach out” (which on a sub note is perhaps impossible for 90% of our police force) but at least he had the right game face on!

He even defended South Africa vehemently when the worlds press condemned us for allowing the slaying of the regal Anni Dewani by calling Shrien a ‘monkey’ who came all the way to South Africa to kill his wife – a bit harsh maybe but I like his gumption!

Having said all of this, are we not a little concerned that a dude dressing like a mining magnet wouldn’t abuse his situation?

Really? Are we that surprised that today we found out he has spent over R1.5m jetting himself (and apparently some high ranking officials – yeah like pole dancers are high ranking!) around the country?

Surprised? No, but a little pissed off with the number of people in power lambasting serious amounts of money all over the world, when people are outside tonight in Gauteng fighting for their lives because of weather like this . . .

Let’s not get even onto things like poverty, running water, starvation, electricity, healthcare, education and the list of boxes not checked by the government goes on and ON!

It’s got to stop somewhere! I’m not saying we need to be drastic, but what I am saying is somehow (and sadly I don’t have the answer) we need to say STOP! We need to dig in our heels and say NO MORE!

At some point we have to start judging people in positions of power more harshly, otherwise, all we will be left with in the end is . . .

The most ironic part of the entire affair is that Bheki has now launched a probe into inflated tenders given out by the Police Dept . . . soon he’ll be referred to as “Robin Hood


JuJu’s on the ropes (but beware the Rope-a-dope people!)

So if, for some reason, you have been pigging out at THE TEST KITCHEN or RUST EN VREDE and then topped it off with a little Sunday avi at Delheim for fondue and jazz in the cellar for the last few days (sorry yes that’s been my weekend – oh I forgot the flammekuchens at bodega with a little Cocoa Hill Rose) . . . HERES THE STORY SO FAR!

Now we’re not so arrogant to think we had anything to do with it but heres what we put out last week!

The weekend broke with, JuJu having been at the centre of a corruption scandal that makes Watergate look like someone just got sexually abused in JZ’s office (Yes maybe a little low blow but really,  have you not met our Pres! The second comparative shouldn’t have raised an eyebrow if you were confused)

 JuJu tries to get the courts to stop City Press from publishing the article that proves he is raping the poor like Marie Antoinette and not even letting them eat cake!

AFRIFORUM like the small annoying Jack Russel they are, open a corruption case against JUJU

All the while JuJu is cruising around in one of these that was openly given to him as a bribe . . .

And best of all the ANCYL website was hacked and this was posted! (If you cant read it, it says HAHAHA! I have a R16 million house and you all dont!!)

Finally, everyone who is anyone has jumped on the bandwagon one way or another and the ANCYL are set to respond today! Personally this is my favorite part because I cant wait for Floyd Shivambu to swear, deflect, make ludicrous accusations and even more far fetched excuses and then call us all white imperialists!

Money on them all blaming this on the misperception of black culture by white westerners?

At the end of the day I think the enemy is certainly at the gate for JuJu the only problem is trying to kill him politically is sadly like trying to stab an octopuss to death – you think you have done it a thousand times but somehow they keep slithering on!

Lastly my parting word for the day, JUST BECAUSE NO ONE EVER SAYS IT, is . . .