Following on from the genius TXTs from last night - we stumbled across the following classics!

Enjoy . . .

FOR MORE CLASSICS – GO HERE!

Somehow these people exist – i just cannot believe it!!

(305):

i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot

(1-305):

lets call myth busters

and

(540):

it’s pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you’ve had sex on

You have to visit TEXTS FROM LAST NIGHT!

Just to get you rolling into the weekend here are two blinders:

For those of you who have been in this or a similar situation know exactly just how desperate you have to be to make yourself hurl to get out of doing something . . .

(949):

I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..

And then here is one for the ladies who are not sure of the best attire for this weekends hopefully warm JHB weather . . .

(647):

Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.

If you are looking at this post rather puzzled – let me explain – there is a brilliant site called TEXTS FROM LAST NIGHT – that you can send funny sms’s to – you just forward them on and so when you combine millions of cellphones / yanks / funnt texts – you get some brilliance!

Now you know go see the history!

In case you needed some advice for the weekend or perhaps something like this happens to you this weekend – we suggest you know the truth! One brave man has put it out there in our TXT of the week!

(210):

Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you’re not wife material.

GO see TEXTS FROM LAST NIGHT?

(440):

I’m using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.

I wish i had this problem but to be fair my neighbours arent exactly the most attractive bunch of people so perhaps this dude lives in next door to the Playboy mansion or in some kind of Maxim campus – either way a problem is a problem!

Finally the VUVUZELA has made it out of South Africa as we all know (Sainsbury sold 22 000 of them before Englands first game in the UK) it has made its way into the mocking world of the bloggers!

But now for the first time it has made its way not only onto the TXTs from last night site but i think more importantly into the subconscious of the world! Enjoy this text from California USA!!

(714):

Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn’t know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.

It doesnt sound like a fun dream BUT WE ARE TAKING OVER THE WORLD BABY!

If you dont have your very own there are two things you can do -- get down to your local -- buy one and BLOW ONE but maybe more importantly you can experience the FUNNELZELA (as shown below)

Or you can get the joy and noise by clicking here!

(949):

The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.

MORE?

(317):

The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said “rough night” and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic

More texts?

(845):

Stop trying to talk to my friends!!

(1-845):

then get some ugly ones…

I must say this seems to be a very fair response – i mean really dont hang around with hot friends if you dont want us to talk to them!

This conversation has taken place many times in and behind the boerewors curtain – the only difference is the sport and the language

(248):

Hey cutie is the game almost over? I’m making dinner for us it’ll be ready soon. Xox

(1-248):

You would rather make fucking dinner than watch a hockey game that rivals the epic-ness of miracle, the one of the biggest upsets in sport history? Babe I don’t know if I can date a girl with such terrible priorities.

Go check the site . . . .

As you know we love this site here – if you havent seen it before you seriously must go check it out! It is any text / SMS that someone has found rather amusing and sent it on – here the ones for this week (too many classic ones i had to post two!)

(210):

Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick

AND . . . (this ones for crappy)

(402):

You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?

(1-402):

I like it rough

For those of you who havent experienced the joy of this site . . here is a taste with a topical tone

(864):

she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY

Basically the site is the funniest texts sent out and published – they are absolutely classic

Read more of them . . .